As I lay in bed yesterday afternoon in terror of another panic attack a unique thought occurred to me.
The words "The Reality of the thing is......" popped into my head. I began to I began to challenge the automatic negative thought (ANTs) patterns with the present. With the present. Not only with positive affirmations that I learned about in the PHP (partial hospital program) that was the therapy part of what I call the "lock up" noted in the blog earlier, but what was happening right then. Thought watching, cognitive thought watching. It worked. Calmed anxiety, brought back an amount of sanity that was just enough to build on.
I went out to Disney to visit my husband as he worked and we watched and fed the squirrels that are his buddies as he works. I am sleeping strange hours now, writing in the very early hours of the mornings, listening to Z88.3 Christian Radio, or yesterday, Warner Brother cartoons. So, I try to go an be with hubby when I can. Miraculously after all of this my husband of 34 years loves me still. We live for each other and crave each other. Thank God for that. A tear slips down from the right eye. He sleeps in the other room because of my strange sleep patterns.
That is the REALITY OF THE THING......
The words "The Reality of the thing is......" popped into my head. I began to I began to challenge the automatic negative thought (ANTs) patterns with the present. With the present. Not only with positive affirmations that I learned about in the PHP (partial hospital program) that was the therapy part of what I call the "lock up" noted in the blog earlier, but what was happening right then. Thought watching, cognitive thought watching. It worked. Calmed anxiety, brought back an amount of sanity that was just enough to build on.
I went out to Disney to visit my husband as he worked and we watched and fed the squirrels that are his buddies as he works. I am sleeping strange hours now, writing in the very early hours of the mornings, listening to Z88.3 Christian Radio, or yesterday, Warner Brother cartoons. So, I try to go an be with hubby when I can. Miraculously after all of this my husband of 34 years loves me still. We live for each other and crave each other. Thank God for that. A tear slips down from the right eye. He sleeps in the other room because of my strange sleep patterns.
That is the REALITY OF THE THING......
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