First Chapters of Clean by A. Junger

The first chapters of the "Clean" book are amazing. It hits the mark perfectly. As I am reading I am still eating the same stuff that I have been for the past few months. I have come far, but still suffer so I constantly compare what I eat, come in contact with in the environment and rate how I feel.
In the first few chapters Junger is laying out the premise of his thoughts.  Before I even get to the program of what to do, I notice that what he says is true. I eat  a package of goat cheese from Whole Foods. It takes about three days to do this for it is the large package. The cheese is

• not cow's milk, so no lactose
• organic
• high in protein, which is good, now that I don't eat meat 

So the cheese is OK, right?  OH! Nooooooo! It causes mucus and contributes to inflammation. Anyone that has read this blog knows that inflammation causes depression. I  thought that this reaction-that the cheese causes problems-was lactose involved. Not so, so I will stop even goat cheese, which has no lactose protein. I am started suffering two days ago, about one day into the cheese feast. Yesterday irritability and OCD reigned for the afternoon. Slowness in thought and loss of focus. Chattering negative rambling in the brain. My poor co-worker, he is ever-bearing, as is my husband. And ackkkkk! Just spilled my salad! (loss of focus!)

Junger states that the toxins in the body causes the body to produce mucus and that the body does this to surround the toxic substance in the body so to separate the toxin from the body. So to stop the mucus, one must stop the toxins, and clean the body of the toxins that are in the body.

.

Food Sensitivites

Tuesday this past, I had chocolate ice cream. Since I am lactose intolerant it was not very smart. The digestion was upset, the bowls did not move the whole system became sluggish and I actually felt ill. And that is now, about three days hence. But I noticed something wrong with the digestion on Wednesday. This is just an example of how long it takes for the food allergies to manifest themselves. No wonder I could not track them for years.
So today I am on high doses of magnesium and prunes to help clear the system. This kinda makes the comfort level low, what with the gurgling noises an sudden rushes to the restroom. But I also note fatigue, slower thinking and some irritability. The last problems are associated with the depression in the past. Also it is harder to type, to spell. Short term memory, concentration are also effected. So there we have it. Another set of depression problems, tied to food.

Caroline at Aetna Behavior Health

A bubbly voice who's owner's name is Caroline called and left her number. After four return calls I wonder if the bubbly is in her head. She has left the line dangling. I am proceeding as if all is cool. I called Dr. Fig and told him that I had to go up to 150ml of the drug Cymbalta. He said that I could not do that and to return to the 120ml level. I asked what I should do once the depression returns. He said I would have my ups and downs. I am fed up with a doctor that has never had depression before. down means images of bloody knives, accidents, relatives dying, anger, irritability, floods of tears and much concern over sanity. So I upped the dosage of another drug. Just a wee bit. I can hide it better. Yes this is not right. But when is the desire for sanity not right. Possible liver damage. But relief from the bizarre thoughts and the crushing"brain hurt".
Brain hurt is a term that I've come to use to describe the get me outta here, this is insane, @#$%& it's here again feeling. It's much more than the last sentence can describe. It's hopelessness that nothing can do anything for me, it is anger that people close to me can not see it. They see me after the tears are dry, once a week for an hour or two. Yes, I can hide it too. Specially to people who don't want to hear about it anyway. I take more medications, and the pit moves away, for a little while.

nicktimeflyer.com

cafepress.com/bubbledreams

thesilhouetteshop.yolasite.com