This booklet, published by Daugherty Ministries out of Tulsa, Oklahoma is amazing. It gives me strength in ways that I never knew before. It makes plain how Jesus is proved to be God. It states how much He loves us. Really. Then the Bible. Each time I read it something new comes to me. I have had it read to me, I have read it many times, but each time now that I read it something new comes from it. It says that the Holy Spirit is working on me as this happens.
Let me tell you that I had run, legs pumping as hard as they could to escape the tyranny of God, the Holy Spirit. And yet He worked on me for years to pull me back.
As I would lie in bed, tears in my eyes from the unknown source of the depression, He was there giving me the will to survive. To find happiness. As I walked the service areas of work, art projects and my husband's face pulled me through. Suicide was ever present, ever behind the art projects and faces of my family. God gave me the art projects, the family to hold on to. If not, I would not be here today to share this with anyone who reads this blog.
Now when I feel I need the strength to go on, well, He is there in Person. Inside me, as I have now asked Him to be. It has, and continues to be an up hill battle to maintain what I call sanity.
This health problem, sanity from depression, has run in my family for possibly about 100 years. I don't know the length, but my relative in some ancient photos (1880's) is know to have been in and out of mental hospitals. She may have been the same person that wanted to die after a horse kicked her in the chest, stomach area. I have another aunt (M) that suffers from the disease, and she is in her mid eighties. My niece that died in Oct 2010 at thirty had at one time been on medications for it. Most of her family suffers from allergies, or has had cancer.
But the fight goes on, and we will survive to tell others, to love them in the best way we can.
Let me tell you that I had run, legs pumping as hard as they could to escape the tyranny of God, the Holy Spirit. And yet He worked on me for years to pull me back.
As I would lie in bed, tears in my eyes from the unknown source of the depression, He was there giving me the will to survive. To find happiness. As I walked the service areas of work, art projects and my husband's face pulled me through. Suicide was ever present, ever behind the art projects and faces of my family. God gave me the art projects, the family to hold on to. If not, I would not be here today to share this with anyone who reads this blog.
Now when I feel I need the strength to go on, well, He is there in Person. Inside me, as I have now asked Him to be. It has, and continues to be an up hill battle to maintain what I call sanity.
This health problem, sanity from depression, has run in my family for possibly about 100 years. I don't know the length, but my relative in some ancient photos (1880's) is know to have been in and out of mental hospitals. She may have been the same person that wanted to die after a horse kicked her in the chest, stomach area. I have another aunt (M) that suffers from the disease, and she is in her mid eighties. My niece that died in Oct 2010 at thirty had at one time been on medications for it. Most of her family suffers from allergies, or has had cancer.
But the fight goes on, and we will survive to tell others, to love them in the best way we can.
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