Something happened to me when the people at YFCC prayed for me. I began to see the statements of the Bible differently. The darkness inside my soul began to recede. I had always thought of the devil as an imp with a pointy tail. Red body, gleeful devilish eyes, but nothing that was going to bother me. Ah, but when I began see the devil as the depression and how the depression was robbing me of my light, of my joy, then, yes the devil was real and the only solution was the light of God. The sin was not see it this way. Once I saw it and asked God to forgive me, well I heard this booming voice "I forgive you". It was not my inner voice, but a much stronger, louder voice. One of strength. Not timid. I had thought that I was not a sinner, I did not steal, murder, lie, cheat on my husband, etc. So why was the message always confess your sins when I had not sinned? How, or why should I feel convicted it I had not sinned? That is where the problem lay, I could not see where I had sinned, so I remained in sin, and in terrible depression. So I asked God to strengthened my faith. With each doubt, He would send me a message almost immediately. I was at work, mind you. Sitting there wondering if God was really there. Within seconds a little boy, about 5 or 6 walks up and hands me a little plastic baggie. Inside was a business sized card that read Godisnowhere. At first I read it God is no where, then as God is now here. It stunned me. It had a piece of candy in the bag and I ate it. The reality of the moment set in. God had spoken to me instantly. Also the sugar started a fatigue problem, further underlining that what I was going through with my health was real, and that God was very much with me in everything in my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment