Thursday, January 29, 2015

Nights of Terror: Days of Brain Fog

I am walking down a path that is untrodden. Not much data is known about switching from drugs to a VNS unit. A VNS unit simulates the brain to produce serotonin.

Messing with the levels of serotonin produces anything from terror dreams to deep depression. But the VNS device produces a strong shock directly to the brain. Drugs do it slower. It has been less than a month and I can see some results.

Terror dreams start about a week before a downfall. I am having them all night long now. Dreams of losing abilities such as simple brain functions and inability to do simple tasks such as using a phone to call for help. An inability to get help and foggy brain. As I go along the dreams usually get worse. They involve movement. Now I have a rail on the side of the bed to keep from rolling off and hurting myself.

I have a job to maintain. Terror dreams of the nature above do not seem much. But this is the start. I have a been there before. I want to feel somewhat in control. I will go slowly. I have two doctors on my case now. They have told me that they don't know much either. The company that makes the device no longer has the nurse I was working with in 2008.  Not knowing what I am getting into is also frightening. Last time, before two mental hospital stays, I did not know what was ahead. I really don't know now, but I have some inkling. I pray for God to lead me. And if you who are reading this are a praying individual please pray for me.

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Latuda

Yesterday while I was looking in my 'this drug doesn't work' bag I found some Latuda. When I looked in this blog I found no mention of Latuda. I would have brought this up to the doctor if I had remembered. That is what this blog is for. Arrrgh! That and spreading the word about how things effect me.

I am going to have the VNS (vagus nerve stimulator) device adjusted. Perhaps it will help me at this time. It seems not to work anyways. The adjustment will happen on the seventh. I will document it one way or the other. The last time I had it adjusted was right before my 2011 hospital stay. That stay was for mental health. I felt good for several days. But it was too strong because it caused increased appetite. I had to eat every hour even throughout the night. I had to eat or the metabolism caused me pain. I had to reduce the device down. We will see what it does this time. We will work at the adjustments more with more patience and perhaps it will, at 100 dollars a pop be adjusted correctly.