Thought Bubbles: Aristotle

                           We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit. — Aristotle

Has anyone ever applied this to depression? If we practice the depression, each and every day, then we become excellent at what we do. Depression is as much a physical thing as a mental thing. If I fill my mind with it in the morning, gripping about this or that,  then the rest of the day I head down that path. The day is no different than the day before no matter what happens. It is you and your reactions to your situation that rule you. Keep your thoughts as near to doing your chores, work, spiritual things, and realize that you are the one that controls what goes on in your mind. Kick the depression to the curb as best you can. Kick it a little more each day. There will be a day that comes where when the depression occurs that you will automatically kick it to the curb. Then you will see that you will become excellent at defeating the monster within.

Risperdal

I am having dreams in which I am very active, talking or moving. The dreams are about escape, running in fear away from something that fills me with terror.  But I do stand and fight.  I have awoke with the words 'CHECK YOUR WEAPONS' coming from my lips. 

I have for years clenched and ground my teeth, and I wear a teeth guard. I have begun picking at sores on my thighs and buttocks. I pick my ears most of each day. These are nervous anxious habits.

I wake up early in the morning  and  when I get past that drowsy stage I write. On my current book, or on what is happening to me. Then as I get tired I slowly sink back asleep.

I have my highest anxiety when I am at work and when I am driving to and from anywhere.

There is a burning in my chest at first.  I counter with a deep breathing exercise. After a while of this anxiety the depression comes on. Some times I can control it through the deep breathing, but that is getting harder to do.  Typical scenes that appear in my imagination are things akin to dogs biting me, relatives or myself having a road accident. 

Last night I went to bed depressed, and am now struggling with not going deeper into the depression. At least at this time I am not overly critical about it, that this whole situation is my fault. I did that for years. When I get into that mode I suffer the most.